for my fellow talkers
I talk a lot.
I mean, a lot.
Especially in the one to two weeks leading up to my period. Then maybe, I want to be alone for a while but overall, I'm a talkative person.
If you're not into talking, you probably won’t enjoy my company. I love analyzing things, anything really, back and forth, inside out: books, movies, the world, the universe, god, people, the city. I want to share my perspective, hear others’, question theirs, and have them question mine.
It’s mental gymnastics for me. And I absolutely love it.
But here’s the thing: this is a two-person sport. You need to find your person. If you're like me and sometimes feel bad about how much you talk, hear me out. I'm here to help you reframe that.
you need to talk becuase talking:
- Helps to externalize mental clutter
- Reveals gaps and contradictions
- Activates different parts of your brain
- Slows down your thinking
- Turns emotion into language
- Invites feedback and perspective
- Strengthens memory and understanding
- Creates a sense of progress
- Builds self-awareness
This is great but it only works if you have a talking partner, a good friend is ideal, and a life partner works too :) And whether you're looking for one or hoping to make it last, there are some critical points to keep in mind:
- You and your “talking body” needs to be confident.
- You both must be able to give and receive criticism.
- You should be okay with agreeing to disagree. Tu sei piccolo, me sei grande!
- No taking things personally.
- You two just need to relax a bit, not take everything too seriously, and share a sense of humor, so the conversation stays lively, not dull.
- There will be times when you don’t feel like talking, especially after a week of intense conversation. Your person should understand and respect that. This goes both ways. When you message them, you should be totally fine with them replying when it’s convenient. You can’t force a good conversation.
- You should be genuinely curious, not just about your own topics, but theirs too. Ask questions, listen deeply, and show up with 100% of yourself.
- It’s okay not to understand everything. Be patient and gentle with yourself and with your chat body.
And ideally, find a friend or partner who’s like you. You will see there are people out there like you. Otherwise you’ll end up questioning yourself. But really, this is just how your mind works. It’s your system. And it’s beautiful.